Post by .:Lion:. on Apr 7, 2011 19:35:22 GMT -5
Always
The smell of peaty soil and wet leaves filled the air. The drip, drip of rain had calmed, though the earth still remained damp with the recent downpour. The ThunderClan camp remained quiet, breathless. A black tom paced the clearing, his gaze fixed on the ground in front of him, mumbling quietly to himself.
"Are you alright, Ashstar?" Ashstar's deputy, Eaglesight, watched his leader with an amused expression on his face.
"You can laugh, Eaglesight. It's not your kits being born." Ashstar muttered, slumping down with his shoulders hunched, his eyes on the nursery where his mate, Brightfire, was giving birth.
"Just because Squirreltail said she had a dream about your kit doesn't mean anything. She had a dream about little Crowkit, too."
"Yes, before his mother died giving birth to him." Ashstar muttered.
"You worry too much, Ashstar." Eaglesight sighed. He turned just in time to see a dark grey blur as he was pounced. He let out a surprised grunt and fell onto his back.
"I, Crowstar, leader of WindClan, have taken down the mighty Eaglestar!" Crowkit exclaimed, puffing out his little chest proudly.
"I'm not dead yet, kit," Ashstar said, narrowing his eyes. Crowkit turned on him, his eyes wide with dismay.
"I was just playing with uncle Eaglesight…" He said guiltily.
"Well, if you ask me," Eaglesight meowed, rolling onto his stomach and looking mischeviously up at his best friend and leader, "The mighty Crowstar shouldn't concern himself with a mere deputy. He should be going for Ashstar, the great leader of ThunderClan, right?" Crowkit yowled and launched himself at Ashstar, who couldn't help laughing at the kit's silly games. The two toms played with the little kit until a ginger she-cat emerged from the nursery. Ashstar got to his paws at once, rushing over to her.
"How is she, Squirreltail?" He asked worriedly.
"Fit as a fiddle. You have two sons and a little daughter," the medicine cat replied. Ashstar rushed into the nursery to see them. He felt Crowkit climbing on his back as he crouched next to his mate.
"Ashstar," Brightfire murmured happily. Their three kits suckled at her belly, two black toms and a she-cat with a tabby pelt like her mother's. Crowkit looked down at them.
"What are their names?" He asked.
"Well, I thought Greykit, Windkit, and Leafkit." As she said the last name, Crowkit's ears twitched and his eyes seemed to go out of focus for a moment. Ashstar didn't notice the reaction.
"Crowkit, come. Stop bothering Ashstar and Brightfire." Crowkit's adopted mother, Fawnleap, called. He obeyed, looking over his shoulder at the kits. He tilted his head to one side and then curled up beside his Fawnleap, falling asleep as Ashstar and Brightfire looked down on their first litter.
"Leafpaw! Come on!" Crowpaw called impatiently. Leafpaw ran after him, her wide green eyes staring into his deep blue eyes.
"I'm sorry." She panted.
"If you want our assessment to go well, you have to keep up." He said. He touched her ear with his nose. "Come on, you can do it!"
She looked up into his eyes and then nodded, her face determined. She would do it!
The two apprentices ran side by side in the undergrowth until Crowpaw pulled up, his ears pricking and his jaw dropping as he tasted the air.
"A pigeon." He murmured. He flicked his tail to where it sat on the ground, picking at a worm in the soil. Leafpaw nodded, watching as Crowpaw began climbing into the tree. She crept forward, her belly fur almost brushing the earth. Then she darted forward, causing the pigeon to flap its wings and take off into the air. Crowpaw flew out of the tree, clawing the bird down with a precise, quick movement.
"You're so good at that!" Leafpaw exclaimed.
"I feel as though I've had a lot of practice with different hunting moves, but I can never figure out why." He said with an amused chuckle. Leafpaw blinked and cocked her head. Should she tell him about the way she could always tell what herbs treated what? She wasn't a medicine cat – she'd never wanted to be one, really. But she'd always known. Maybe if Squirreltail hadn't taken her sister as an apprentice, she would have considered the job. But she preferred hunting with Crowpaw to gathering bitter herbs anyway.
"Well, let's keep hunting!" She said. "You'll be a warrior before the day is out, I'll bet!" They ran together, side by side. The two worked as a team and managed to catch two squirrels and another bird before Crowpaw's mentor, Eaglesight, called for them to return to camp. Crowpaw and two other apprentices, Pricklepaw and Snakepaw, were due to receive their warrior names. Leafpaw was happy for her denmate. But she would miss sharing a nest beside his, feeling his warmth and comfort. Her brothers were always off on their own adventures, ignoring her. But Crowpaw had never ignored her before. They were close, and she'd always felt that he was special, someone to confide in and care for. He understood her, like no other cat did.
"Let all cats old enough to hunt their own prey, join beneath Highrock for a Clan meeting!" Ashstar called out. Leafpaw looked up at her father and smiled, glad to see him looking strong and proud. Crowpaw was shifting nervously beside her, his eyes huge and expectant.
"Crowpaw, Snakepaw, and Pricklepaw, please come forward." He called. They did. He asked each of them if they would respect and uphold the warrior code. The answers were all yes.
"Snakepaw, from this day forward you will be known as… Snakeeyes. Pricklepaw, from this day forward you will be known as Prickleclaw. Crowpaw, from this day forward you will be known as… Crowflight. StarClan honors all of your courage and strength and welcomes you as full warriors of ThunderClan." The Clan called out each new warrior's name. Leafpaw called Crowflight's out loudest of all, feeling as if she had said that name or one like it many, many times before…
Leafpaw sat at the border between ThunderClan and WindClan, staring out at the open moorlands. She felt expectant. The smell of herbs was strong about her, though she wasn't sure why. A scent that was altogether unfamiliar and yet painstakingly real came to her, and she saw Crowflight padding towards her. Only, he looked different. He was thinner, his legs longer. Leafpaw realized that, suddenly, she was looking down as if from a great height as the two cats met – the strange Crowflight and an even stranger her.
"You have been given another chance," a soft voice whispered in her ear. She saw three faces looking at her with hatred in their eyes. Crowflight turning his back on her. Her Clanmates curling their lips in disdain. Humiliation. Uselessness. Longing.
And then she woke up. Leafpaw shook her head, wondering what her dream meant. She padded out into the sunlight, watching as Squirreltail emerged from her den. Their eyes met, and the medicine cat beckoned her over.
"I had a dream last night," they said at once. Each cat looked at each other in surprise.
"You had a dream?" Squirreltail inquired.
"Yes. I dreamed that I saw Crowflight coming from WindClan… only he wasn't Crowflight. And I was waiting for him on the border. But then he turned away, and they all looked at me so coldly. And then a voice said 'you have been given another chance'."
"So my dream was correct, then, all those moons ago…" Squirreltail murmured.
"What?" Leafpaw asked, confused.
"It's nothing, Leafpaw. Your dream is merely a glimpse into the life of the cat you are named for, whether in purpose or destiny." The medicine cat murmured. Leafpaw blinked, not comprehending. But before she could ask, Ashstar called for a Clan meeting.
"Greypaw, Windpaw, and Leafpaw, please come forward." His eyes shone with pride as he looked down at them, his kits. One by one the apprentices were given their names. Greypaw became Greydust. Windpaw became Windwhisper. Leafpaw looked up into her father's face as he named her, wriggling with excitement, wondering what sort of name she would receive.
"From this moment forth you will be known as… Leafsky." Leafsky. Free to run, free to be with the one she loved. Leafsky wasn't sure why she thought this, but as she turned and met Crowflight's gaze, she felt that it didn't really matter.
Crowflight hunched his shoulders against the cold, trudging alongside Leafsky as they made their way to the Gathering. He cast a glance about him at the endless moors of WindClan territory. Why he'd always felt at home there he'd never know. It was cold, there were no trees. But every time he passed through the barren landscape, Crowflight suddenly felt as if his legs were long and his weight like that of a feather. He imagined flying across the turf, racing after rabbits just like the WindClan cats. Was this how his friends felt? Was this the feeling of a ThunderClan warrior? Crowflight wondered, but he would never ask – not even Leafsky. He glanced at her. The she-cat's lovely tabby pelt shone in the moonlight, as did her rich green eyes. No. Especially not Leafsky.
"Rabbit hole." Leafsky warned. Crowflight blinked and just narrowly avoided stepping into a burrow. He wrinkled his nose. WindClan territory – home? What a stupid thought. He'd take ThunderClan territory any day. The tom's eyes shifted back to the moors. Yes. Trees and prickly brambles and closed-in spaces. His heart sank.
"What's wrong, Crowfeather?" Leafsky asked.
"Huh? Crowfeather?" Crowflight turned back to her, frowning. She blinked, looking confused.
"Did I say that? Oh well. Must have been… wandering thoughts, you know…" Leafsky shuffled her paws in embarrassment. Crowflight looked at her steadily, deep in thought. Suddenly a whisper came to him, as if on the wind. Leafpool… His heart felt like it was being wrenched in his chest. He didn't understand. Why did he feel this way when he looked at Leafsky? Why did he feel like… he would inevitably lose her?
"Let's just get on to the island." He said quietly, feeling sick. Crowflight watched Leafsky as she crossed the tree bridge, which was sagging painfully near the water. The Clans had often talked of creating some other way to cross onto the island, but few ideas had surfaced on the matter. Crowflight watched in apprehension as she crossed, his breath in his throat. Suddenly, as one of the cats jumped off the tree, it lurched, sending Leafsky into the water. She let out one desperate cry, lashing out with her paws as if to grip the air, and then the water dragged her under. Without thinking, Crowflight flung himself into the freezing water. He struck out with all his might, feeling the current drag him out towards the lake. He grabbed Leafsky by the scruff. Suddenly the voices began whispering again, in that dark cold place. Thanks for saving me… Do you think you're a leader with nine lives…? Be more careful! No…! Feathertail…! He struck out towards the shore, fighting against the cold and the terrible ache that filled his heart. He finally managed to drag her onto the island. She coughed feebly, and at once Squirreltail was at her side.
"Are you hurt?" Crowflight turned in response to the gentle, silvery voice. Two blue eyes met his, framed in a face as beautiful as the stars. A small smile played at the she-cat's mouth at his stupefied expression.
"I'm Featherfall. Honeydew's apprentice." Honeydew… the RiverClan medicine cat. Crowflight sat up quickly, his fur dripping. He probably looked pathetic, but somehow that didn't really bother him.
"I'm not hurt," Crowflight managed to stuttered, trying to look dignified but failing. Featherfall's eyes glittered with amusement.
"Oh, I see. Well, that's good. Let's get you warmed up." With the help of their Clanmates, Leafsky and Crowflight were soon dried as best as they would be. The Gathering started as soon as they were settled in. Crowflight sat next to Featherfall and her brother Midnightfrost, with one of his Clanmates, Sedgeclaw, on his other side. Featherfall's kind manner, her gentleness, made him feel comfortable with her and her brother. Midnightfrost was less genial, but Crowflight still preferred his company to some other cats'. The Gathering ended, and Crowflight was left to carefully watch Leafsky cross the bridge yet again.
"You were very brave, jumping after her like that." Featherfall said suddenly. Crowflight turned and saw her eyes were looking at him with a strange sort of expression, as if she were remembering some bittersweet memory. Crowflight blinked and tilted his head to one side slightly.
"It's what any cat would do." He said. Featherfall smiled.
"Yes," she murmured, "Maybe." As their Clans parted ways, Featherfall turned to go. But then she looked back, and Crowflight noticed her sad smile.
"What?" He asked, a bit fidgety under her deep blue stare.
"You have the chance to be happy now," she said. "I'm glad." And with that, she turned and vanished into the crowd of her Clanmates. Crowflight was left staring after her, his eyes wide. Leafsky called to him, and he turned away from Featherfall, still wondering what she had meant by her last words to him…
"So what do you think?" Sedgeclaw's voice was only working to irritate Crowflight more. He sighed crossly. Sleep had eluded from for far too long. He'd been dreaming of wandering along the lakeshore of WindClan territory, when Leafsky – or a cat that looked like Leafsky – met him. They talked, and in that moment Crowflight realized he wasn't really the cat Leafsky was talking to. The self he was aware of was thinner, smaller, different.
"Crowflight?" Sedgeclaw asked impatiently. Crowflight snapped back to reality, his eyes widening. He then flicked his ear and shrugged his shoulders.
"What would I know how Leafsky feels about you? She probably thinks you're a mousebrain like most other cats do." He said irritably.
"But she doesn't dislike me, right? I have a chance?" Somehow his friend asking him if Leafsky was interested made Crowflight angry. He glared at Sedgeclaw and hissed softly.
"I doubt it." He muttered.
"You can't deny that she's the prettiest she-cat in ThunderClan. Lots of toms have their eye on her. Nighttail, Firewish, Grousewing…"
"Enough!" Crowflight snarled. Sedgeclaw started, his eyes wide at his friend's reaction.
"I was only teasing." He murmured.
"There's some truth in every jest." Crowflight said, almost to himself. He looked over his shoulder and saw Leafsky padding into camp, setting two mice on the fresh-kill pile before turning her attention to her companion, Nighttail. The black tom's deep amber eyes were staring into her green ones, intent. Crowflight felt as if a flame were burning inside his chest as he marched over.
"Leafsky," he said gruffly, "I want to talk with you." Leafsky looked at him with a surprised expression on her face. Then she nodded to Nighttail and followed Crowflight out of camp, up the rise to the lake, where he stopped on the hill that overlooked the massive expanse of water. From there, he could see RiverClan, part of ShadowClan, and even some of the moorlands of WindClan. Leafsky glanced at Crowflight, sensing his distress but not understanding it.
"What's up, Crowflight?" She asked gently.
"What is it between you and Nighttail?" He demanded. She blinked.
"We were hunting." She replied quizzically.
"Right. Hunting. Why don't you just tell me the truth? You like him, right?"
"As much as any cat." Leafsky mewed, looking increasingly confused as Crowflight paced back and forth, his fur on end and his tail twitching.
"Well he likes you. All the toms ever do is stare, stare, stare. It drives me insane!" He growled.
"Why? Why should you care what toms do around me?" Leafsky demanded, the fur around her shoulders bristling a little. He stopped, turning to look at her. The deep burning in his eyes silenced her, and she felt the ghostly presence of another her pressing against her, whispering, But… you can't love me…
"Because I don't want them looking at you like that. And I'm… I'm afraid one day you'll look back…" He murmured. Leafsky looked into his worried face, wondering. I can't stop thinking about you… It was like Crowflight's voice. Crowfeather… Leafsky felt it – the weight of destiny on her chest like deadweight. She knew it, of course. She'd always known it. Her feelings had been a surprise, maybe, only in thought. But she'd always known how she felt.
"There's only one tom I'll ever look at." Leafsky said gently. Crowflight looked up and met her gaze. He caught his breath. He'd waited so long to see that look, the same one he'd seen in the dreams he'd had. Dragging in a shaky breath, he took a step forward. Leafsky met him, touching noses with him, her eyes closed, a smile on her face.
"I love you," Crowflight whispered to her, emotion choking him.
"Only you…" She replied quietly, and the world suddenly seemed…
Right, somehow.
Fulfilled.
"Tigerkit! Firekit! Get back here this instant!" Crowflight called. His sons turned to look up at him, their whispers drooping. Bluekit, his one daughter, looked at them from where she sat by her mother's side.
"Toms," the kit sniffed. Leafsky chuckled softly, nudging her kit.
"You won't have to worry about them for a few years yet, my love," she said. Bluekit looked up at her and blinked.
"Mother," she said, "Why are you sad?"
"I'm not sad, Bluekit," Leafsky said, looking at her mate and smiling through her stinging eyes, "I'm happy. So happy." Bluekit watched her mother's face and then turned to see her grandfather, Ashstar, talking with her father.
"Do you love daddy?" Bluekit asked.
"Of course," Leafsky replied, "I've always loved him."
"Why?" Bluekit looked curiously up at her mother. Leafsky looked down at her and smiled.
"It was destiny, sweetheart."
"Oh." Bluekit looked at her father and saw him glance back at Leafsky. He bowed his head to Ashstar and approached, touching noses with Leafsky.
"I love you," he murmured into her ear, and she smiled as she watched Bluekit rush after her brothers.
"And I love you," she whispered.
"Always…" Leafsky leaned against him and smiled, sighing softly. She turned and was surprised to see five figures. Three of them stood and bowed their heads, turning away. Two remained, and Leafsky recognized them. She smiled at Leafpool and Crowfeather.
"Finally…" They murmured together, smiling back. The two cats looked at each other and then their images faded. Leafsky felt as if a soft breath of wind was floating around her, though she felt warm in her mate's presence. She turned and saw that Crowflight had watched them depart, as well. He met her gaze and leaned close so that she could feel his breath on her face and taste the sweet smell of him on her tongue.
"Always." They whispered as one.
The smell of peaty soil and wet leaves filled the air. The drip, drip of rain had calmed, though the earth still remained damp with the recent downpour. The ThunderClan camp remained quiet, breathless. A black tom paced the clearing, his gaze fixed on the ground in front of him, mumbling quietly to himself.
"Are you alright, Ashstar?" Ashstar's deputy, Eaglesight, watched his leader with an amused expression on his face.
"You can laugh, Eaglesight. It's not your kits being born." Ashstar muttered, slumping down with his shoulders hunched, his eyes on the nursery where his mate, Brightfire, was giving birth.
"Just because Squirreltail said she had a dream about your kit doesn't mean anything. She had a dream about little Crowkit, too."
"Yes, before his mother died giving birth to him." Ashstar muttered.
"You worry too much, Ashstar." Eaglesight sighed. He turned just in time to see a dark grey blur as he was pounced. He let out a surprised grunt and fell onto his back.
"I, Crowstar, leader of WindClan, have taken down the mighty Eaglestar!" Crowkit exclaimed, puffing out his little chest proudly.
"I'm not dead yet, kit," Ashstar said, narrowing his eyes. Crowkit turned on him, his eyes wide with dismay.
"I was just playing with uncle Eaglesight…" He said guiltily.
"Well, if you ask me," Eaglesight meowed, rolling onto his stomach and looking mischeviously up at his best friend and leader, "The mighty Crowstar shouldn't concern himself with a mere deputy. He should be going for Ashstar, the great leader of ThunderClan, right?" Crowkit yowled and launched himself at Ashstar, who couldn't help laughing at the kit's silly games. The two toms played with the little kit until a ginger she-cat emerged from the nursery. Ashstar got to his paws at once, rushing over to her.
"How is she, Squirreltail?" He asked worriedly.
"Fit as a fiddle. You have two sons and a little daughter," the medicine cat replied. Ashstar rushed into the nursery to see them. He felt Crowkit climbing on his back as he crouched next to his mate.
"Ashstar," Brightfire murmured happily. Their three kits suckled at her belly, two black toms and a she-cat with a tabby pelt like her mother's. Crowkit looked down at them.
"What are their names?" He asked.
"Well, I thought Greykit, Windkit, and Leafkit." As she said the last name, Crowkit's ears twitched and his eyes seemed to go out of focus for a moment. Ashstar didn't notice the reaction.
"Crowkit, come. Stop bothering Ashstar and Brightfire." Crowkit's adopted mother, Fawnleap, called. He obeyed, looking over his shoulder at the kits. He tilted his head to one side and then curled up beside his Fawnleap, falling asleep as Ashstar and Brightfire looked down on their first litter.
"Leafpaw! Come on!" Crowpaw called impatiently. Leafpaw ran after him, her wide green eyes staring into his deep blue eyes.
"I'm sorry." She panted.
"If you want our assessment to go well, you have to keep up." He said. He touched her ear with his nose. "Come on, you can do it!"
She looked up into his eyes and then nodded, her face determined. She would do it!
The two apprentices ran side by side in the undergrowth until Crowpaw pulled up, his ears pricking and his jaw dropping as he tasted the air.
"A pigeon." He murmured. He flicked his tail to where it sat on the ground, picking at a worm in the soil. Leafpaw nodded, watching as Crowpaw began climbing into the tree. She crept forward, her belly fur almost brushing the earth. Then she darted forward, causing the pigeon to flap its wings and take off into the air. Crowpaw flew out of the tree, clawing the bird down with a precise, quick movement.
"You're so good at that!" Leafpaw exclaimed.
"I feel as though I've had a lot of practice with different hunting moves, but I can never figure out why." He said with an amused chuckle. Leafpaw blinked and cocked her head. Should she tell him about the way she could always tell what herbs treated what? She wasn't a medicine cat – she'd never wanted to be one, really. But she'd always known. Maybe if Squirreltail hadn't taken her sister as an apprentice, she would have considered the job. But she preferred hunting with Crowpaw to gathering bitter herbs anyway.
"Well, let's keep hunting!" She said. "You'll be a warrior before the day is out, I'll bet!" They ran together, side by side. The two worked as a team and managed to catch two squirrels and another bird before Crowpaw's mentor, Eaglesight, called for them to return to camp. Crowpaw and two other apprentices, Pricklepaw and Snakepaw, were due to receive their warrior names. Leafpaw was happy for her denmate. But she would miss sharing a nest beside his, feeling his warmth and comfort. Her brothers were always off on their own adventures, ignoring her. But Crowpaw had never ignored her before. They were close, and she'd always felt that he was special, someone to confide in and care for. He understood her, like no other cat did.
"Let all cats old enough to hunt their own prey, join beneath Highrock for a Clan meeting!" Ashstar called out. Leafpaw looked up at her father and smiled, glad to see him looking strong and proud. Crowpaw was shifting nervously beside her, his eyes huge and expectant.
"Crowpaw, Snakepaw, and Pricklepaw, please come forward." He called. They did. He asked each of them if they would respect and uphold the warrior code. The answers were all yes.
"Snakepaw, from this day forward you will be known as… Snakeeyes. Pricklepaw, from this day forward you will be known as Prickleclaw. Crowpaw, from this day forward you will be known as… Crowflight. StarClan honors all of your courage and strength and welcomes you as full warriors of ThunderClan." The Clan called out each new warrior's name. Leafpaw called Crowflight's out loudest of all, feeling as if she had said that name or one like it many, many times before…
Leafpaw sat at the border between ThunderClan and WindClan, staring out at the open moorlands. She felt expectant. The smell of herbs was strong about her, though she wasn't sure why. A scent that was altogether unfamiliar and yet painstakingly real came to her, and she saw Crowflight padding towards her. Only, he looked different. He was thinner, his legs longer. Leafpaw realized that, suddenly, she was looking down as if from a great height as the two cats met – the strange Crowflight and an even stranger her.
"You have been given another chance," a soft voice whispered in her ear. She saw three faces looking at her with hatred in their eyes. Crowflight turning his back on her. Her Clanmates curling their lips in disdain. Humiliation. Uselessness. Longing.
And then she woke up. Leafpaw shook her head, wondering what her dream meant. She padded out into the sunlight, watching as Squirreltail emerged from her den. Their eyes met, and the medicine cat beckoned her over.
"I had a dream last night," they said at once. Each cat looked at each other in surprise.
"You had a dream?" Squirreltail inquired.
"Yes. I dreamed that I saw Crowflight coming from WindClan… only he wasn't Crowflight. And I was waiting for him on the border. But then he turned away, and they all looked at me so coldly. And then a voice said 'you have been given another chance'."
"So my dream was correct, then, all those moons ago…" Squirreltail murmured.
"What?" Leafpaw asked, confused.
"It's nothing, Leafpaw. Your dream is merely a glimpse into the life of the cat you are named for, whether in purpose or destiny." The medicine cat murmured. Leafpaw blinked, not comprehending. But before she could ask, Ashstar called for a Clan meeting.
"Greypaw, Windpaw, and Leafpaw, please come forward." His eyes shone with pride as he looked down at them, his kits. One by one the apprentices were given their names. Greypaw became Greydust. Windpaw became Windwhisper. Leafpaw looked up into her father's face as he named her, wriggling with excitement, wondering what sort of name she would receive.
"From this moment forth you will be known as… Leafsky." Leafsky. Free to run, free to be with the one she loved. Leafsky wasn't sure why she thought this, but as she turned and met Crowflight's gaze, she felt that it didn't really matter.
Crowflight hunched his shoulders against the cold, trudging alongside Leafsky as they made their way to the Gathering. He cast a glance about him at the endless moors of WindClan territory. Why he'd always felt at home there he'd never know. It was cold, there were no trees. But every time he passed through the barren landscape, Crowflight suddenly felt as if his legs were long and his weight like that of a feather. He imagined flying across the turf, racing after rabbits just like the WindClan cats. Was this how his friends felt? Was this the feeling of a ThunderClan warrior? Crowflight wondered, but he would never ask – not even Leafsky. He glanced at her. The she-cat's lovely tabby pelt shone in the moonlight, as did her rich green eyes. No. Especially not Leafsky.
"Rabbit hole." Leafsky warned. Crowflight blinked and just narrowly avoided stepping into a burrow. He wrinkled his nose. WindClan territory – home? What a stupid thought. He'd take ThunderClan territory any day. The tom's eyes shifted back to the moors. Yes. Trees and prickly brambles and closed-in spaces. His heart sank.
"What's wrong, Crowfeather?" Leafsky asked.
"Huh? Crowfeather?" Crowflight turned back to her, frowning. She blinked, looking confused.
"Did I say that? Oh well. Must have been… wandering thoughts, you know…" Leafsky shuffled her paws in embarrassment. Crowflight looked at her steadily, deep in thought. Suddenly a whisper came to him, as if on the wind. Leafpool… His heart felt like it was being wrenched in his chest. He didn't understand. Why did he feel this way when he looked at Leafsky? Why did he feel like… he would inevitably lose her?
"Let's just get on to the island." He said quietly, feeling sick. Crowflight watched Leafsky as she crossed the tree bridge, which was sagging painfully near the water. The Clans had often talked of creating some other way to cross onto the island, but few ideas had surfaced on the matter. Crowflight watched in apprehension as she crossed, his breath in his throat. Suddenly, as one of the cats jumped off the tree, it lurched, sending Leafsky into the water. She let out one desperate cry, lashing out with her paws as if to grip the air, and then the water dragged her under. Without thinking, Crowflight flung himself into the freezing water. He struck out with all his might, feeling the current drag him out towards the lake. He grabbed Leafsky by the scruff. Suddenly the voices began whispering again, in that dark cold place. Thanks for saving me… Do you think you're a leader with nine lives…? Be more careful! No…! Feathertail…! He struck out towards the shore, fighting against the cold and the terrible ache that filled his heart. He finally managed to drag her onto the island. She coughed feebly, and at once Squirreltail was at her side.
"Are you hurt?" Crowflight turned in response to the gentle, silvery voice. Two blue eyes met his, framed in a face as beautiful as the stars. A small smile played at the she-cat's mouth at his stupefied expression.
"I'm Featherfall. Honeydew's apprentice." Honeydew… the RiverClan medicine cat. Crowflight sat up quickly, his fur dripping. He probably looked pathetic, but somehow that didn't really bother him.
"I'm not hurt," Crowflight managed to stuttered, trying to look dignified but failing. Featherfall's eyes glittered with amusement.
"Oh, I see. Well, that's good. Let's get you warmed up." With the help of their Clanmates, Leafsky and Crowflight were soon dried as best as they would be. The Gathering started as soon as they were settled in. Crowflight sat next to Featherfall and her brother Midnightfrost, with one of his Clanmates, Sedgeclaw, on his other side. Featherfall's kind manner, her gentleness, made him feel comfortable with her and her brother. Midnightfrost was less genial, but Crowflight still preferred his company to some other cats'. The Gathering ended, and Crowflight was left to carefully watch Leafsky cross the bridge yet again.
"You were very brave, jumping after her like that." Featherfall said suddenly. Crowflight turned and saw her eyes were looking at him with a strange sort of expression, as if she were remembering some bittersweet memory. Crowflight blinked and tilted his head to one side slightly.
"It's what any cat would do." He said. Featherfall smiled.
"Yes," she murmured, "Maybe." As their Clans parted ways, Featherfall turned to go. But then she looked back, and Crowflight noticed her sad smile.
"What?" He asked, a bit fidgety under her deep blue stare.
"You have the chance to be happy now," she said. "I'm glad." And with that, she turned and vanished into the crowd of her Clanmates. Crowflight was left staring after her, his eyes wide. Leafsky called to him, and he turned away from Featherfall, still wondering what she had meant by her last words to him…
"So what do you think?" Sedgeclaw's voice was only working to irritate Crowflight more. He sighed crossly. Sleep had eluded from for far too long. He'd been dreaming of wandering along the lakeshore of WindClan territory, when Leafsky – or a cat that looked like Leafsky – met him. They talked, and in that moment Crowflight realized he wasn't really the cat Leafsky was talking to. The self he was aware of was thinner, smaller, different.
"Crowflight?" Sedgeclaw asked impatiently. Crowflight snapped back to reality, his eyes widening. He then flicked his ear and shrugged his shoulders.
"What would I know how Leafsky feels about you? She probably thinks you're a mousebrain like most other cats do." He said irritably.
"But she doesn't dislike me, right? I have a chance?" Somehow his friend asking him if Leafsky was interested made Crowflight angry. He glared at Sedgeclaw and hissed softly.
"I doubt it." He muttered.
"You can't deny that she's the prettiest she-cat in ThunderClan. Lots of toms have their eye on her. Nighttail, Firewish, Grousewing…"
"Enough!" Crowflight snarled. Sedgeclaw started, his eyes wide at his friend's reaction.
"I was only teasing." He murmured.
"There's some truth in every jest." Crowflight said, almost to himself. He looked over his shoulder and saw Leafsky padding into camp, setting two mice on the fresh-kill pile before turning her attention to her companion, Nighttail. The black tom's deep amber eyes were staring into her green ones, intent. Crowflight felt as if a flame were burning inside his chest as he marched over.
"Leafsky," he said gruffly, "I want to talk with you." Leafsky looked at him with a surprised expression on her face. Then she nodded to Nighttail and followed Crowflight out of camp, up the rise to the lake, where he stopped on the hill that overlooked the massive expanse of water. From there, he could see RiverClan, part of ShadowClan, and even some of the moorlands of WindClan. Leafsky glanced at Crowflight, sensing his distress but not understanding it.
"What's up, Crowflight?" She asked gently.
"What is it between you and Nighttail?" He demanded. She blinked.
"We were hunting." She replied quizzically.
"Right. Hunting. Why don't you just tell me the truth? You like him, right?"
"As much as any cat." Leafsky mewed, looking increasingly confused as Crowflight paced back and forth, his fur on end and his tail twitching.
"Well he likes you. All the toms ever do is stare, stare, stare. It drives me insane!" He growled.
"Why? Why should you care what toms do around me?" Leafsky demanded, the fur around her shoulders bristling a little. He stopped, turning to look at her. The deep burning in his eyes silenced her, and she felt the ghostly presence of another her pressing against her, whispering, But… you can't love me…
"Because I don't want them looking at you like that. And I'm… I'm afraid one day you'll look back…" He murmured. Leafsky looked into his worried face, wondering. I can't stop thinking about you… It was like Crowflight's voice. Crowfeather… Leafsky felt it – the weight of destiny on her chest like deadweight. She knew it, of course. She'd always known it. Her feelings had been a surprise, maybe, only in thought. But she'd always known how she felt.
"There's only one tom I'll ever look at." Leafsky said gently. Crowflight looked up and met her gaze. He caught his breath. He'd waited so long to see that look, the same one he'd seen in the dreams he'd had. Dragging in a shaky breath, he took a step forward. Leafsky met him, touching noses with him, her eyes closed, a smile on her face.
"I love you," Crowflight whispered to her, emotion choking him.
"Only you…" She replied quietly, and the world suddenly seemed…
Right, somehow.
Fulfilled.
"Tigerkit! Firekit! Get back here this instant!" Crowflight called. His sons turned to look up at him, their whispers drooping. Bluekit, his one daughter, looked at them from where she sat by her mother's side.
"Toms," the kit sniffed. Leafsky chuckled softly, nudging her kit.
"You won't have to worry about them for a few years yet, my love," she said. Bluekit looked up at her and blinked.
"Mother," she said, "Why are you sad?"
"I'm not sad, Bluekit," Leafsky said, looking at her mate and smiling through her stinging eyes, "I'm happy. So happy." Bluekit watched her mother's face and then turned to see her grandfather, Ashstar, talking with her father.
"Do you love daddy?" Bluekit asked.
"Of course," Leafsky replied, "I've always loved him."
"Why?" Bluekit looked curiously up at her mother. Leafsky looked down at her and smiled.
"It was destiny, sweetheart."
"Oh." Bluekit looked at her father and saw him glance back at Leafsky. He bowed his head to Ashstar and approached, touching noses with Leafsky.
"I love you," he murmured into her ear, and she smiled as she watched Bluekit rush after her brothers.
"And I love you," she whispered.
"Always…" Leafsky leaned against him and smiled, sighing softly. She turned and was surprised to see five figures. Three of them stood and bowed their heads, turning away. Two remained, and Leafsky recognized them. She smiled at Leafpool and Crowfeather.
"Finally…" They murmured together, smiling back. The two cats looked at each other and then their images faded. Leafsky felt as if a soft breath of wind was floating around her, though she felt warm in her mate's presence. She turned and saw that Crowflight had watched them depart, as well. He met her gaze and leaned close so that she could feel his breath on her face and taste the sweet smell of him on her tongue.
"Always." They whispered as one.